Two People In One
by Mic Finger
Two people in one,one happy,one sad
Two sides of me,one mad and one glad.
There's only one side,I try to let show;
my feelings inside,the others don't know.
I'm two people in one,as strange as that sounds,
the real me inside,no one has found.
Entries
Friday, February 12, 2010
It's been a long time since I posted... I think I really am having an identity crisis...on New year's eve... I hope New Year Wishes do work because I know what I want to wish for. I wish that I can get all my feelings straight and relive my life and make everything right.
I'm just so mixed up right now..I don't think I'm being real..It feels like I'm following in someone elses footsteps..like I'm always hidden behind the shadows and trying to copy others and their perfect lives which I want to have.
I want to stop feeling so inferior and unsure of myself...I think I have serious psychological issues..how long has this lasted already? It comes and goes so unexpectedly..hah I'm probably developing a split personality..I don't understand myself. I don't understand what I want. I don't understand what I'm feeling. And I don't know what to do about it. I don't know what I need to make things right.
Or maybe I just think too much..Let me think...
I Draw @ 8:53 AM
Monday, December 21, 2009
I feel that my life is really screwed up now... Cs is away for that china immersion trip...and I obviously can't call her up to talk. I screwed up things between you and me Ave...I'm really sorry. I have been skipping training since..well a long time ago...hence haven't spoken to hui hui or amelia in a long time... I no longer have cathechism classes..I won't get the opportunity to talk to my classmates. Sab has left me for Germany until next year.. I've been grounded and hence have skipped every class outing... I feel like an outcast..have i been abandoned?
My life is screwed up. I've screwed up and ruined everything for myself..heh It's like I have this emptiness inside of me...Ave, I guess I can feel it now...
I think I know the solution inside...but I'm afraid..I don't want to do it..I'm ashamed... Someone please...help me?
I Draw @ 7:07 AM
Friday, October 2, 2009
urgh seriously pissed off at some people now...but i can't say because i have to be nice and it might hurt their feelings *rolls eyes* whatever....but let me give you a hint:
People who are...so crazy about something that they are willing to do anything despite being forewarned of how tough it is going to be...they are out of their minds!
And no...I'm not talking about ambitious, determined people...I'm talking about people who are obsessed with some unrealistic dream! (seriously not aiming any determined people or something...I admire those people for being so motivated!)
But...alright i suck at giving hints...people who are obsessed with celebs?! are you kidding me??? I really can't take all that hysterical screaming anymore...or the cuteness...
I have nothing against any of you as a person...but if you all happen to see this blog post... COULD YOU PLEASE STOP THE IDOL OBSESSION! IT'S UNHEALTHY! and not just me other people are irritated as well...please just stop it...or at least do anything in moderation..OR FIND A BETTER HOBBY!
okay next subject...My dad showed this to me and i found it really touching...maybe I'll donate some of my savings to them :)
Please do too!
I Draw @ 12:53 AM
Friday, September 25, 2009
Woo! Paper 1 is officially over! Haha chinese was horrible as usual...but I really hope I did well for english..I feel as though its my most personal compo I have written yet! Haha and GOD HELPED ME TO OVERCOME MY FEARS! :) Just like the main character in my composition haha..:)
I nearly had a heart attack today...I nearly lost my wallet at KFC during "class" dinner (not alot of people went la...all ponned school after that...including me! ) and I was feeling really pissed with some people...but anw...
As we were heading to the mrt station..I REALISED I LOST MY WALLET! I shall try to dramatise it a bit....
As I raced towards the entrance of KFC, I felt my heart pounding loudly in my chest. I dodged past a crowd of noisy students, weaving between the crowd. The same thoughts kept running through my head: Is it still there? Could it have been stolen already? What am I going to do?!?! I was panicking as I opened the entrance door, a sheen of sweat covering myself from head to toe....and bla bla bla okay I won't continue anymore... But I found my wallet! Thank god! Haha :)
okay i'm bored and going to study oral >< good luck all for tmrw!
I Draw @ 7:06 AM
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Oh man...today i utterly failed to study anything at all! I ended up falling asleep! So I'm going to start chionging now...
but before that i want to describe my first time to a professional hair salon! whee! I think my hair looks so good that I really don't want to wash it! :)
So at first i was really scared and stuff because well it looked professional and all its customers were all older people?? But then they made me feel much better after offering me and my mother drinks...:) 1 point~ And then they cut your hair and stuff...oh i though it was quite cool that the thing you know they cover you with to stop hair from falling on your clothes? it had sleeves!~ haha okay I'm easily impressed.... Then after that they wash your hair and massage your scalp and neck! damn shuang...(but I was still feeling slightly uncomfortable because i was wondering how many students in school uniform do they perform this service for??) and then they give you a blowdry and cut your hair again...and they put some cream meant to improve you hair quality or something...and it smells really good! Like apple actually....
Super cool la!~ I love my hairstyle :) hope it lasts till tmrw! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
alright i better start going to mug now >< have alot of catching up to do for the time wasted this afternoon...crap! btw abit of extra information: Trichophobia=fear of hair!
I Draw @ 4:05 AM
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
This is a post to wish everyone good luck for their mid year exams! :) haha the picture is just random!
And then I feel like reflecting today...so...ya... I was thinking that I would like to thank hanyu...for letting me not be afraid of admitting stuff... You know everyone hides stuff because they will be scared how others may think they are weird or something? Well but hanyu you let me realise that well i'm not the only one who thinks about stuff like that? Like...about how it would be to be in a world described in a book? And imagining what it would be like to have magic powers and other stuff like that? Yeah...I bet it sounds kiddy.... but I guess that's just me...and well..I never discussed all my secret dreams and fantasies with others because I'm afraid I'll be seen as childish and be a social misfit? Now not so hesitant I guess..:) don't laugh though please? I just realised that i'm hiding alot of stuff...ah well still going to keep quiet about most of them though :) shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............:D
I Draw @ 1:54 AM
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Haha superheroes turned old! I guess we can't be perfect forever...quite a comforting thought for me actually :)
I Draw @ 2:54 AM
About Me
Name: Vanessa Soh
Age: 15 going on 16
School: Anglican High
Birthday: 9th September 1994
I'm mostly just looking for guidance..and hoping that I'll manage to get my head straight..
Credits
Design by wishix
Characters drawn and color by wishix